Roman Reigns

15 Things I Learned from WWE RAW – 3/23/15

15 Things I Learned from WWE RAW – 3/23/15

WWE RAW 3/23/15 – Go Home and Be a Better WWE

  1. All jokes aside, Sting’s entrance is still surreal…even though the Crow theme fits too well!
  2. Paul Heyman goes to lengths in his promos and doesn’t screen them by Brock Lesnar.
  3. What’s up with all this keep-away/tug-o-war playground sh*t with the belts?!
  4. Snoopmania got promo skills my nizzle.
  5. Bray Wyatt is requesting the POWAH!
  6. Natalya finally met a bull she couldn’t ride.
  7. Swagger vs Rusev 9000. Which way is it not supposed to go?
  8. Steph…you’re not on the same level of Sting..hotness aside.
  9. Apparently, the bat is a shotgun in Triple H’s eyes.
  10. Too much mania going on to make a good Wrestlemania!
  11. The punt has to return.
  12. Always look before you elbow someone.
  13. Even LL can’t hype this dead Wrestlemania up.
  14. All we need now is for Bray Wyatt to do is reconstruct his chair.
  15. Cena wins, Bryan wins, Reigns wins, Wyatt wins, and no one cares about anything else.

15 Things I Learned from WWE Smackdown – 3/19/15

15 Things I Learned from WWE Smackdown – 3/19/15

WWE Smackdown 3/19/15 – Wrestlemania BETTER Be Good!

  1. Mercury loves to fly…into an RKO.
  2. Interspecies?! It’s a guy in a flipping bull outfit!!!
  3. Win or lose, all 6 people involved in the 6-man Intergender/Interspecies match lost points.
  4. Big dog looks like a puppy going into this Lesnar match.
  5. Barrett, you haven’t had the IC title for weeks. Get used to it.
  6. Daniel Bryan & Dolph Ziggler stole the show.
  7. You cannot keep out snakes!
  8. It’s like WWE is trying to salvage storylines out of this PPV.
  9. I can say, ‘Brie Mode’ louder.
  10. Mark Henry took a nap instead of wrestle tonight.
  11. Don’t cut great promos, you’ll get held back.
  12. Don’t be an amazing wrestler/seller. You’ll lose a main event spot to big guys.
  13. Bryan better be careful on that neck. That suplex looked nasty.
  14. I still feel like Smackdown is a recap show.
  15. Think: If Cena wins and Bryan wins, then WWE wins altogether. Lesnar could disappear and the 2 titles look like the WWE and World Heavyweight championships again.

15 Things I Learned from WWE RAW – 3/16/15

15 Things I Learned from WWE RAW – 3/16/15

WWE RAW 3/16/15 – Convince me, WWE!!!

  1. When the lights go out and there’s crows making noise, run.
  2. A viper and a scorpion make great pets.
  3. Raise your hand if you thought Randy Orton was really with the Authority.
  4. Noble’s secret weapon is that he’s truly as tall as the Big Show.
  5. All you have to do, Superman, is run down Russia. Hell, pull the damn flag down.
  6. Tag team titles are so insignificant, that the belts will go to El Torito and then they will be deactivated.
  7. I’m still not convinced, people. Brock Lesnar loses to Roman Reigns?!
  8. Brock Lesnar will activate defense mode and sit up from 3 spears.
  9. How do you make a giant dominant? You don’t. HE’S A FLIPPIN GIANT!!!
  10. I can. I will. I can. I will. What is this, the little spear engine who could?
  11. Ladies and gentlemen, give Heyman a different microphone because the WWE microphone melts from such greatness!
  12. Why are we talking about floaties when there’s the 2nd most important title in WWE in the ring?!
  13. So, this was Seth’s trap?! The ‘Oooh, piece of candy’ from Family Guy was better.
  14. Steel chairs are heavy. I’d perfer a kendo stick or bat.
  15. Next week, Sting ziplines from the raptors!!!

 

15 Things I Learned from WWE RAW – 3/2/15

15 Things I Learned from WWE RAW – 3/2/15

WWE RAW – 3/2/15: GET THE SHOVEL!!

  1. John Cena has that, “Get in where you fit in,” mentality.
  2. Steph, people proclaim all the time about matches they will be in. Royal Rumble, anyone?
  3. John Cena should be the Authority’s best friend. He’s the reason they’re back.
  4. WWE is a titanic with more band aids than Mick Foley’s injury count.
  5. Damn Jon Stewart ownership of the microphone.
  6. Would Kane get his briefcase back?
  7. Fake firing is worse than being fired for real.
  8. Today’s segment: The Nutcracker.
  9. How to piss off a Russian? Rip down the flag!
  10. The enemy of my enemy is my enemy when there is a title on the line.
  11. CM Punk let AJ come back to work.
  12. The two most epic people on the mic are at the top and bottom of the show. Paul Heyman and Bray Wyatt
  13. Randy Orton is a team player. Team Viper.
  14. Jon Stewart knows the WWE locker room well.
  15. Never wrestle alone if you have more than one color in your hair and wear tights.

15 Things I Learned from WWE FastLane

15 Things I Learned from WWE FastLane

WWE FastLane 2/22/15, aka Superman Returns

  1. Hide your nuts from Russians.
  2. All the divas from NXT were laughing at the atrocity that was Paige vs Nikki.
  3. Stardust found out that the cosmic key requires one person.
  4. When you’re a ref, do NOT hestittae when counting pinfalls.
  5. JBL has random knowledge in his head that he spits out. This is called, ‘Color Commentating’.
  6. Jon Stewart can cut a better promo than 50% of the WWE roster.
  7. Cesaro/Tyson Kidd….Swiss Kidd or the Cesaro Kidd?
  8. Sledgehammers get beat by baseball bats.
  9. Sting made money tonight by not saying a word.
  10. Bray Wyatt wants to become a deadman.
  11. Wade Barrett has a warrant in Memphis. That’s why he ran.
  12. #RKOOuttaNowhere
  13. Naomi in The Usos entrance makes it flaming hot.
  14. Who really thought they’d see this guy tonight?
  15. So, what was the purpose of removing Roman out of the event to just throw him back in it?