15 Things I Learned from WWE RAW 6/3/13

  1. So, the best wrestler on your roster is the weak link but he pulled DOUBLE duty?!
  2. Oh shit, the NBA Playoffs are going on…let’s get on TV! – Vince to Stephanie
  3. I’m wrestling tonight! But wait, I’m going home, and I’m gonna wrestle next Monday night!
  4. Curtis Axel will have a new mix of his theme by Smackdown. Just watch.
  5. Also, the win was so insignificant that Justin Roberts did not even mention it.
  6. So, the contract was filed in Heyman’s trousers? File it on deez nuts!
  7. “I beat Kofi. I beat you. I will put you through a table. My name is Ryback. RYBACK RULES…need more to process.” That shit was robotic and almost like a cyborg. “TOUGH GUY”
  8. So, I’m supposed to like a tall version of Hornswoggle in a flannel? Sorry Wyatt Bros.
  9. So, Heyman, Jericho is supposed to be afraid of being booed? Wait, when Jericho was booed, he was still more over than CM Punk and actually trusted in a main event match. Let that sit for a second.
  10. Vince McMahon’s hair is timeless…
  11. The effort to keep the black Pilsbury Dough…oh sorry, Big E Langston relevant continues.
  12. Let’s make shit legit…call Triple H by his real name…yeah, that’ll get some attention. CM Punk wants the page out of his ‘shoot’ playbook back.
  13. When I say “YOU MADE” you say, “RAW!”
    “YOU MADE”
    “YOU MADE”
  14. Ques gonna kill….damn, I got a brain freeze! What’s the guy’s name…oh, Titus O’Neil. The audience barking now.
  15. TNA Slammiversary…WWE Take NOTES! I mean seriously, get to taking!