15 Things I Learned from WWE RAW – 7/29/13

I learned….

  1. Big E should change his entrance to ‘Thong Song” by Sisqo.
  2. Bray Wyatt is the devil.
  3. Vince should not tell us that Randy Orton will cash in his briefcase.
  4. John Cena is not a liar….he may not be a Truther either.
  5. Corporate Bryan will be a bad idea. Guy is too over as a face.
  6. Mark Henry has skin colored ring gear.
  7. Ryback took that table like a beast! Bam and up the ramp in seconds.
  8. Cena and Daniel Bryan talked about the whole belt thing at the end….while banging the Bellas.
  9. That one of the best tag team wrestlers and multi-time world champ AND NWA World Champ is an underdog to Alberto Del Rio.
  10. Maddox…plaid is not you. Give it up!
  11. Vince wants Cena heel. WWE Universe wants heel. Cena wants face.
  12. John Cena is not a better man than Vince…but he owns WWE.
  13. Daniel Bryan has more hair on his beard than Vince has on his head.
  14. Sadly, there are people out there that do wish the ring blows up when Cena is in it.
  15. Hi (breathes hard), I’m Ryback. I never won a Pay Per View. But (breathes hard), I’m so hungry (breathes hard), I’ll beat up a guy who no one will remember after the next segment.