I see myself sometimes a recluse. Leaving a shadow….and maybe a few Starburst wrappers letting people know I was there.
To cap it all off, I have been a recluse for the past 7 years, only being outward when necessary. The only things that bring me out were my involvements on campus, my Greek life, and my academic career. I don’t know why, but that was always how I lived. I didn’t exactly have a spotlight or a microscope on my life. Honestly, I liked it that way. It kept my imperfections out of the public eye. Then again, I wouldn’t know how to correct them if they weren’t out in public now wouldn’t I?
An advise to the wise: secrecy only leads to deception and betrayal. It is true that one should be selective with what is told, but to live a life of complete seclusion is sick. The hardest lesson I learned is that I needed people. Without them, who can I actually help or be helped by? A hard lesson to learn, but one that this reclusive person needed to learn.
I like to have unique stuff. Things that seem normal but actually aren’t.
I hate the norm with a passion. That’s why I push so hard to be different and diversify my talents. LosEvolution=JOAT (Jack of all Trades). Unfortunately for me, I find myself being selfish or self-centered on my improvement. I do not want the world to see me at my worst, so I take time away from it when I work on being me. There is my abnormality, the thing that sets me aside from others….
I don’t try to have a “fuck the world” mentality or look on my face, but sometimes it just happens.
Some people say I look angry, some say I look sad
Truthfully, the concept is that I am rarely mad
I tried to find thing to smile about and thing to show my teeth
I found it in the people I like to greet
I then looked hard for all my respect
I looked towards others, with and without regret
I learned that respect comes from myself
It comes from the emotions that my heart felt
It comes from the flame that makes the haters melt
It just happens…..it just goes and comes
It flows like morphine, making everything numb
It just happens to be who I am and who I be
So don’t assume I’m angry because the sullen look that you see
My life is in my poetry, though I try not to mention others in my work. It is words of emotions, not words directed towards anyone
If anyone decided to read my words, you have basically found out my life. My life is in my poetry, from my intricate past to my complex present. I try to emphasize where I came from because it is one thing I do not want to forget. Also, I use my words because vocal expression is difficult to some degree.
This is perhaps the real reason my poetry is perhaps the way of releasing my emotions. It is a crucial thing when it comes to my development because if I don’t release it, it won’t come out.
“Words are the sounds of emotions”
My emotions dictate my sound, whether it is hard or soft. As I continue to let my emotion flow in my words, I ask, “How do YOUR words flow?”